Tag Archive for 'personal life'

Dating Nightmares Are To Be Avoided

Published
by
Nigel Evans
on December 8, 2009
in self improvement
. 0 Comments

Well minded people often tell us that there are plenty more fish in the sea when we break up with somebody, or if we are questioning a current relationship. That may be the case, but what are the odds of finding the perfect guy for you amongst the millions of men in the world? Logically, this might seem like an insurmountable challenge and when you start to remember those dating nightmares that you have endured, you might think it is in impossible task. Through an element of preparation though, you might find it is not as difficult as this after all.

If you wake up in a cold sweat when thinking about those dating nightmares, you might be tempted just to stay in bed, but really trying to find somebody new can be a lot of fun. Never judge anyone by their cover and look forward to the discovery of it all, but by all means make some significant decisions during your first date and make a good assessment of what this guy is all about, deep down.

Unfortunately there are some guys who are very egocentric out there and only want to talk about themselves, what they are, where they have been and where they are going. This kind of one-sided relationship is not for you and you should pay close attention to whether he is actually listening to you when you are talking to him or whether he is just working out what he is going to say to you next as he bores you to death.

Guys on the rebound are some of the worst type of dating nightmares you can come across. They are invariably trying to find somebody to make up for their bad feelings, depression or loneliness. How do you know that he is not going to parade you in front of his ex, just for spite?

We all need an element of organization in our lives, but we do not need to be obsessive-compulsive about it and neither should your partner. Unless you really like the thought of being micromanaged then you should run the other way if you come across someone who is always over-analyzing things, fretting about this or that or just not going with the flow. Life is too short to be too engrossed in technicalities.

Don’t be tempted to rush to judgment or to want to find out everything that you can about the guy on your first meeting. You will want to see that he is stable, his finances are okay and that you can at least have an equitable arrangement between you. You won’t be too impressed if he makes you pay for dinner the first time, will you, and while it is perfectly okay to share, you might expect him to do the right thing on this first occasion. Freeloaders are some of the worst dating nightmares as well.

Look for a spike of personality at the very least during your first date. You must have somebody with well-rounded interests and who is going to be fun to hang around with, or it will soon deflate into boredom with everything that that brings.

You don’t have to go through a roller coaster of emotions when you are trying to find a partner for life. Just be philosophical and understanding and realize that you have to go through several false starts and dating nightmares before you will find the right man for you.

Writer Alan Bentley has a lot of information to help you avoid dating nightmares. A fantastic resource is available at www.cracktheguycode.com.

Why Date More Than One Man?

Published
by
Alan Bentley
on November 21, 2009
in self improvement
. 0 Comments

If you feel that you have been locked into several unproductive relationships over recent years, then you could be forgiven for thinking that you are wasting your time. Some women in this situation consider that they should use their time more effectively and consider whether they should date more than one man at a time. At least you have a better chance of success?

You may think that you were just hedging your position and there is no harm in what you are doing, but you must be very careful if you do decide to date more than one man. Realism is very important and you have to be ultra-fair to everyone involved, otherwise you will certainly end up in a sour position.

You may very well be using your time more efficiently, but if you really are going to date more than one guy you need to ask some very hard questions of yourself. Other people will undoubtedly criticize you and is your skin thick enough to be able to cope with this unconventional position?

Time is very precious and when you date more than one man you will have even less of it than you thought you had before. Be very selective in your “list of candidates” and realistic as well. Are both guys truly potential candidates for the long haul?

Don’t jump into bed with each guy! This is not the time for intimate relationships and the process you’re going through is merely a process of selection. Anything else is very unfair.

Because you’re likely to run into people who you know, try and avoid going to the same venues with each guy. To a certain extent you are going to have to have different worlds, or be prepared for some awkward encounters.

Before you begin to date more than one man, let each of them know what is going on. Honesty is definitely the best policy here and you want to be sure that they are fully accepting of the situation. If they find out the hard way there will be fireworks for sure.

Because you are trying to create a life for yourself ahead, it is important that you do not come up with a different persona when you date more than one man. For example, you might think that one guy particularly likes a certain characteristic and the other might like something else. Don’t split yourself this way or you’ll confuse everybody!

Author Alan Bentley has a lot of information to help you date more than one man. A fantastic resource is available at www.cracktheguycode.com.

I Want to Date a Separated Man

Published
by
Alan Bentley
on November 20, 2009
in self improvement
. 0 Comments

It is said that love knows no boundaries and we have no real control over our true feelings. Sometimes when we look across the room we feel a flutter in our heart and know that it is potentially a great connection. We may know little about the guy, his background or his circumstances, but what are we to do?

It’s great to discover all you can about a potential love interest. It’s nice to spread the discovery over a period of time as this is part of the fun of dating. Nevertheless, certain fundamentals are very important and you don’t want to go too far down the road before you get some answers. How do you know if it is okay to date a separated man in the circumstances?

When you date a separated man be prepared for lots of different challenges. You have to have pretty strong feelings for him before you want to take on this additional load, as it is much easier dating someone who is unencumbered.

Discover his long-term intentions before you agree to data a separated man. At this point you will need to ask some very specific questions and listen attentively to everything he says. Within his answers, there are sure to be many subtle things to be learned.

Many of us know what it feels like to be “on the rebound.” We are maybe trying to make up for lost time and can be much more outgoing and care free than we should. You need to beware of a guy who may be in this situation and do a lot of detective work, so that you can find out what he really feels about his wife and whether there is likely to be a reconciliation.

You will be criticized heavily by certain people when you date a separated man, no matter what you think. Are you tough enough to get through this phase, again ask yourself how you really feel about him.

If you are predisposed to be jealous then you might not want to date a separated man. There will be times when he will talk about her, she will come up in conversation or you will meet her in person. You may be able to cope with this, but it is a significant question.

Divorce can be a very touchy subject and rightfully so. However you do want to know what his status is as this has a definite bearing on where you are going. Understand that when you data a separated man it can only be this way for a certain amount of time

Writer Alan Bentley has a great deal of material to help you date a separated man. A great resource can be found at at www.cracktheguycode.com.

Do You Have Any Hot Date Ideas?

Published
by
Alan Bentley
on November 9, 2009
in self improvement
. 0 Comments

That sense of anticipation and excitement is palpable when you have just arranged to go out with that guy. You have been interested in him for a long time and maybe now you will be able to make something happen and find that he is the one for you. Now is the time to come up with some really hot date ideas to make a good impression right from the start.

If you are coming off a long list of failed relationships, you want to be sure that you make the next one work. There is nothing worse than the up-and-down feeling that you get when you bounce from one guy to another, when all you really want to do is to settle down into a steady relationship. You don’t want to put a foot out of place this time, but you do want to create some hot date ideas so that you keep this alive and smoldering.

There is no need to tiptoe around during the early days of a new relationship, as many guys and girls tend to do. They may be worried that they should not be too wild and choose for the mundane or predictable. This inevitably leads to a Saturday night at the club, which is very predictable, what you really need to do is create a hot date idea to provide a spark.

How about spending some time together in the kitchen? Don’t laugh, this can be a great bonding experience when you both learn to create something special. Make sure the ambience is correct, maybe enjoying a bottle of wine as you prepare. You can include some of those special ingredients designed to stimulate libido!

While you might not think that a guy would be interested, you would probably be surprised to learn that he would jump at the chance to go with you to a spa for a treatment. This may not be the cheapest option, but it will definitely make you both feel good and you tend to hang onto those memories, don’t you?

Be creative and come up with some hot date ideas out of everyday tasks. By adding a special twist to something that you need to do anyway you can show that there is fun to be had at any time with your new love interest.

Don’t be part of the old school and think that you have to let him come up with all the options and all the ideas. This is the 21st century and its quite acceptable for the girl to come up with some hot date ideas as well.

Don’t get too carried away with your new and hot date ideas, until you have had a little bit of time to get to know him. If you let yourself go and come up with something which is too crazy then you might scare him off! Innovation is great however to uncover something which is of interest to both of you and can become the foundation for your future.

Expert Alan Bentley has a great deal of material to help you understand hot date ideas. A great resource is available at www.cracktheguycode.com.

The Complex Process of Dating

Published
by
Alan Bentley
on November 2, 2009
in self improvement
. 0 Comments

The process of dating can be a long, tiring and sometimes lonely road. Some people view it as a pleasant experience while others may be so lonely that they just want to get to the “live in” arrangement and skip all the semi-formalities. Fundamentally, we should all remember to live in the moment and enjoy the journey of life, including this process.

There’s no point in going out and trying to find a partner until you have looked inwardly and analyzed your situation completely. It is not fair to bring baggage from a previous relationship to a new one, nor is it okay if your finances are generally in a mess and you don’t know where you are going in life. Is your education complete and your career path clear?

It is said that we become whom we associate with and you should really look at our lifestyle. Remember that the ultimate outcome of a process of dating is to find someone to share your life with. You and he will have to completely complement each other and you should therefore be sure where you are in your life story. Are you really ready to open the door yet?

The process of dating can mean different things to different people. To start off with, where are you going to “look” or rather make yourself available to see what happens. Will you resort to socializing at bars and clubs, are you going to hang out with friends and join social clubs or sports venues to see who you meet, or are you going to sit in front of the computer at night and surf through those online dating places?

A fresh start may be required if you have tried and failed with those traditional resources. Making this kind of start and turning over a new leaf could be just what your process of dating requires. Above all else, never try and force the situation to work for you.

When you are single, life certainly has a different makeup. Some people crave the partnership and cannot bear to be alone, while others understand that there are many different opportunities, options and pleasures to be enjoyed as a single person.

Everyone must realize from time to time that we are only here for a relatively short period and we should try and enjoy it as much as we can, while we can. Always be moderate in your outlook, especially when it comes to dating and understand that in many respects what is destined to be, will be.

The correct approach to the process of dating is to take time and to understand there is no shortcut. If you attempt to jump in without fully understanding everything about him then you are in for trouble. Take time to understand who he is if you want a long-term association to materialize.

Author Alan Bentley has a lot of material to help you understand the process of dating. A fantastic resource can be found at at www.cracktheguycode.com. Click here to get your own unique version of this article with free reprint rights.

Cracking the Male Code May Be Easy

Published
by
Alan Bentley
on September 11, 2009
in self improvement
. 0 Comments

Have you noticed a considerable amount of frustration when it comes to your personal life and dating? It seems that many women find it very hard cracking the male code, as they feel they are at a disadvantage. This is not just true in the workplace or at home, but especially so when dating.

On the face of it, it would appear to be a man’s world, especially when you look at professional arenas. There are far more men at the top of their game than women in most cases. This doesn’t mean that there are a different set of rules to play by but it probably means that women are not being assertive enough. It’s time that this position was reversed!

If you get on the same wavelength as men, does this mean that you have worked out the age-old problem of cracking the male code. Does it just mean that, mentally and emotionally you have to act like a man to succeed? This is probably not true as surely equality means an equal dose of mutual respect, rather than sameness.

Confidence is everything and is the reason why you must show this in your relationship. Of course you should never be subservient, but many women seem to be almost hardwired to accept the man’s dominant position and this invariably leads to discomfort down the road.

If you don’t try and over-analyze it, cracking the male code may be a whole lot easier. Have you noticed how often they talk in sports metaphors and how most of them seem to be absolutely glued to anything concerning sports? Maybe this leads to the realization that they need to be hunting in packs and is an ancestral trait. Maybe it means that they feel there is safety in numbers and are in fact trying to avoid having to accept the error of their ways!

Maybe you need to domesticate your man and this is where cracking the male code can be a lot of fun. If you try and look at the big picture where you fit in, you will see that men view women as someone who takes care of details. As such, when he provides the food, you are expected to cook it. Modify your relationship and see what happens.

Confidence can be sexy and you should show it at all times. You never know how this may benefit your relationship to start off with. Don’t confuse confidence with aggression though and think that you have to give “like for like” with him. Don’t act like him, just be confident.

Before you analyze your partner too much, remember that fundamentally there is a big difference between men and women and this is further compounded by the fact that as individuals we are all very different anyway. Just accept him and he will accept you and remember that life is too short for any other approach.

Expert Alan Bentley has a lot of material to help you learn about cracking the male code. A great resource can be found at at www.cracktheguycode.com.

Understanding Male Behavior Is Difficult!

Published
by
Alan Bentley
on September 3, 2009
in self improvement
. 0 Comments

Just when you think you are understanding male behavior and have finally come to grips with the man in your life, there he goes again and does something that you just cannot explain. How are you supposed to develop a long-term and meaningful relationship with this man and doesn’t it seem that all men are the same? You just cannot understand why they do what they do.

Men are always right, haven’t you noticed that? One of the keys to understanding their behavior is to realize that they have a huge ego. If you practice a little reverse psychology, agreeing with everything he says but also suggesting an alternative that is also right, he will be so confused that he will agree to whatever you are saying!

It can be very frustrating when your love interest doesn’t seem to understand that you have feelings as well. While we know that they do not really show their emotions, it is annoying that they put ours down to the “time of the month” and think that our hormones are misbehaving. This is a big difference between men and women.

Books have been written about understanding male behavior and how you just cannot seem to get them to commit to anything. How long have you been together for now? It’s about time that he made some kind of commitment and whereas he says that he loves you, you would like to see some tangible evidence of that as it is surely the time to settle down. Don’t put it off forever and decide whether you think he will change.

You may have to get used to the fact that men like to flirt and this is quite harmless. Understanding male behavior is so difficult, especially when it comes to this facet. Try not to be so insecure as some men feel that they are just “supposed to do this,” as strange as it may seem.

Never try and interact with your man when he is concentrating on something as vitally important as a sports game! It may appear as if sports is the most important thing in the guy world, but if you are good at understanding male behavior you will realize that this is just a part of the psyche. They are expected to enjoy certain things and prioritize them more than you can understand. Just give him his space, for the time being.

You may well have to be a bit assertive yourself when you find that you are in a position where you are hanging out with your love interest and his friends. Often it seems that he will pay more attention to them and avoid making you the focus of attention. Experts say that this is the “dominant male” behavior and that you should be gently injecting your presence into the conversation.

Understanding male behavior takes a lot of practice. If you are able to decipher his actions and see through the sometimes annoying results, you’ll likely find that for the majority of the time he is perfectly acceptable!

Author Alan Bentley has a lot of material to help you learn about understanding male behavior. A great resource is available at www.cracktheguycode.com.

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