Crazy People Work From Home…

Like most of my counterparts, at times I sit and contemplate why most of the time men don’t call when they say they will. These are the times when the mind gets flooded with questions like ‘Is he playing games with me?, ‘Is something else going on in his mind?’ or ‘Is it just another trick to attract more attention? The entire day passes by and the eye keeps rolling over the phone again and again expecting his call. The long wait finally turns into frustration and ultimately into rejection.

Although men may use this phrase “to escape” from what they perceive as a bad date, most will say it as an automatic end-date comment. They may have many others things occupying their schedule and not able to call for several days. Work pressures, family obligations, or even sickness can delay a call. Many men do want to call and make another date but until they fully know their future schedule are not able to commit and therefore won’t call till they can.

Today, some men may not have the social skills that you may consider normal. While they may have valid reasons for not calling after saying they will, they are unaware of the misunderstandings and misconceptions that can develop by not doing so. A simple nudge from a common friend may be enough to get a brief call to explain the situation that he may be uncomfortable explaining, and thereby relieving you of hurt feelings and several days of second guessing of what, if anything, you may have done wrong.

The whole no-call situation may also be a test of your reaction. This is especially true after several dates. By doing this, and gauging your reaction, a man can determine his importance in your life. Remember men, as a species, are very sensitive although they seldom show this to others. If you react, or overreact, to this non-call incident he can determine his importance in your life. Whether you want to accept it or not every relationship has a controlling partner. At the start of any relationship it is usually the woman. As the relationship evolves that often changes. If this becomes a continuous behavior it then moves from a test to just being thoughtless. That is a point when you have to make a decision.

As such, in these cases, it is always advisable to show such men that you have an independent life of your own and such small incidents, as his missing phone call does not actually pester you . It is preferable that you do not show your restlessness to him by calling him again and again but this should not be taken to such an impersonal level that the man feels dejected leading to an unwanted breakup. The best way is to show your self-respect to him, which is sure to increase your appeal. In any case, if the man does not call you regularly, it is best not to waste your life on such men and move on.

Julissa de Mayo is the webmaster and primary author for the Soulmate Blog. The Blog is an open forum to read and discuss interpersonal issues with knowledgeable people and others who may have lived through s similar problem. The Soulmate Blog is free and open twenty-four hours a day seven days a week for your access.